The Cotopaxi Questival

Wow. This weekend has been crazy including getting lost in Idaho, jumping into the Great Salt Lake fully clothed, camping, watching the sunrise, and seeing some pretty sweet environmental art! I'll be sure to write more about this later, but here is a sneak peek!!

Did You Know?

Did you know that I am only 4' 10 3/4"?

Did you know that my favorite color is yellow?

Did you know that I could eat cereal any time of the day and not get tired of it?

Did you know?

What an amazing question that is... One that inspires curiosity and allows you to learn. There's a running joke about Snapple lids and how no matter the flavor or whether it's good or bad at least you learn something with every bottle.

Did you know vultures can fly for 6 hours without flapping their wings?

Did you know a full moon is nine times brighter than a half moon?

Did you know you share your birthday with at least 9 million other people on the world?

Did you know?

I had this question asked to me earlier this week, and it kind of broke me a bit. It was something that made me feel pity and made me think about myself and the type of person I've become. Many people know the relationship my siblings and I have with my dad and that it's not a good one. On Sunday, my mom called me and was talking to me about a lot of things that are going on and how everyone is kind of dealing with them by not dealing with them.

I am naturally a peacemaker. I don't like arguments, and though I can get into them, many times I don't find reason to get angry. It takes a lot to make me mad and I like it better like that. I also trust people very willingly, not caring what others think I should do. That sometimes hurts me when people abuse that trust, but I would rather give someone the benefit of the doubt than immediately put them in a bubble of doubt. Lastly, I have learned how to forgive. I forgive even when others have not apologized. Some people say that makes me a bigger person, but honestly, sometimes saying that you are willing to forgive is the only way you can move on from a situation because the second party is not willing to apologize.

But back to my conversation with my mom. As she was talking about everything that's been going on, she asked me if I called my dad this past week. I told her that I had on Wednesday or Thursday and she was quiet for a minute on the phone. With tears in her voice, she said to me "I know that sometimes you guys don't think your dad cares at all, but he does. He just doesn't know how to show it. Do you want to know what your dad said to me this week?" I begrudgingly said yes and she said, "He was just quiet for a long time and he looked over at me and said 'Did you know Diana is the only one of our kids who calls me?'"

I started crying

I pity my dad, because he doesn't realize how much the things he has said and done affect us.

I pity the fact that my 5 siblings don't want to call because they don't want to forgive him, and they have just cause.

I pity the fact that many times, I call simply because I know that if I don't, I'll feel like I'm going to get in trouble.

I constantly say that everyone has the potential to become so much more, so much better than they are now, and that is myself included. It is so sad to think that of six, I am the only child that is willing to put aside my prejudices and make a two-minute phone call, yet right now maybe that's how things need to be. I have a firm belief that one day, things will be different. I don't know if that day will come on earth or after the great Millennium, but one day, things will be different, and I gladly welcome that day.

Did you know that although he has told me terrible things, I still find a way to love my dad?

Because I do

Diana Laura Peck

What is it Worth?

As the days go by, sometimes I wonder how I do it. How the heck do I work from 5pm to 1:30am every day? How the heck do I manage to always have enough for rent and food and school? How the heck am I taking like 17 credits every semester? How the heck do I somehow manage to have a social life (kind of)? How the heck am I still alive?

Yet none of those things really matter.

Yes, I want a good job. Yes, I want to have great friends to hang out with. Yes, I realize that the choices I am making now will help me to find a better future. However, those are not the things that I find important every day when I wake up.

I am a thinker. One of my strengths is actually intellection. This basically means that I enjoy thinking about things and I can never have nothing on my mind. It helps me think things through when I am making decisions and it keeps me busy at all times, because I always have time to think in my mind. This also means I have an unlimited amount of time to worry, and let me tell you, I worry.

I worry that I won't ever accomplish my career goals. I worry that I will not make enough time for friends. I worry that I will not be able to make it next month. I worry that one of these days, I'm going to crash and it's going to hit me like a million bricks all at once.

But none of those things worry me more than my family.

One person in my family in particular is my best friend in the whole wide world. You may know who I am talking about because I have written about them before. They worry constantly about life and about the things they hear...both out loud and inside their heads. Because when someone tells you that your hair looks weird today, you can brush that off and keep moving forward. But when someone tells you that they can't imagine anyone loving you, that tends to leave a mark. When someone tells you that you are worthless time and time again, that sticks. Because we are human, and we want to be accepted. When we are not accepted, we try harder and harder to change that. And sometimes, no matter how hard you try, some people will never accept you.

Hatred and anger have led people to do some terrible things. Hatred and anger have caused so much sadness and misery. Hatred and anger have caused years of worry.

"How old are you?" is a constant question in my world, to which I often respond "Guess."

What is the usual response? "Probably 22.." "I'm guessing 24." "When I first met you, I thought 25."

"I'm only 19."

Some people will never know the impact they have on others. Sometimes, they know and they don't want to admit that they could have caused a change in someone that defines how they grew up. Sometimes they know and will never accept that it's their fault. Because having to look someone in the eyes and apologize for the years of hatred and anger that aged someone to be older than they are... having to look someone in the eyes and apologize for the hurt inflicted over the countless days... is not worth it.

So let me ask you: What is it worth?

Because I would give every penny in my name to my family. I would fight to the ends of the earth for my family. I would give every last breath I have to my family. I would give every drop of blood in my body to my family. Because they matter more than the world and more than my own life to me.

My family is worth the fight.

"The hammer that breaks glass can also forge steel."

I am a woman of steel, and there is nothing that can tell me otherwise. Why?

 I am a daughter of Heavenly Father, who loves me. And I love him.
And every day, that's what makes everything worth it.

Diana Laura Peck

And the days fly by...

This week had been slow, but oh how the days fly by!

It has been such a good week that I felt the need to document it in this blog because as originally stated, this blog is about my life: all the good, all the bad, and everything in between. So let me tell you about my week.

#1:

Wednesday! I did two good things this day. First off, I went running! It's been a while, but I totally ran a little over two miles to Temple Square and back. I felt super good through the run and the weather was so nice that it just put me in a great mood. Once I had gotten home and showered, I started getting dressed and I went to the temple! When I got there, there were a bunch of youth groups there, so I thought I might only get to do confirmations before I had to leave to go to work, but I ended up staying to do baptisms and I was out of the temple by 4:35 pm. I was able to get to work, change into my uniform, and clock in on time! TEMPLE MAGIC!

#2:

This Thursday two great things happened. The first was that I got to hang out with my cute little nephew, Jace, for like 2 1/2 hours. He is seriously so precious and I love every minute I get with him. He was so teeny tiny when he was first born and he has gotten to cute little normal baby size at this point and he is just darling. I love him so much and honestly he is perfect.

Immediately after he and Nicole left, I started getting ready for something I've wanted to do forever.

WICKED!

This show was seriously everything I wanted it to be and more. It was intense, funny, and just plain awesome on so many levels. It amazes me to see the talent we have on this world and being able to witness it in a production like Wicked was phenomenal. The fact that I got to share this experience with my sister, Tatiana, was even more amazing. We tried going to see Les Miserables in March together, but our schedules just would not cooperate. Nevertheless, we found a way to watch this show together, and as I have already said countless times: it was awesome!

#3:

Now it is Friday and it means today I send out emails :) Always a very happy day. On top of that, I also am starting today at work as a Lead over the West Office Building. While our wonderful Jaclyn is on maternity leave, I'll take over the WOB for a month, then Nikki will take over for a month. Let's see the challenges that are brought to me through this change!

#4:

I have already spoken about this on my blog before, but once again, I am so happy! Ana gets here on SUNDAY! One more day until she will be living with me. OH MY GOSH. I just can't contain my excitement and I'm sure she will be happy here. I hope I can help her with anything she needs!

Diana Laura Peck

Single Digits

9 days.

Then 8 days.

One day after that it will be 7 days.

Then 6 and then 5.

Pretty soon it'll be 4.

Before you know it, 3.

2 days will be left.

Then it will be the big day.

We are single digits away from one of the most exciting days of 2014.

The day Ana moves to Utah.

I know I don't say this a lot, but I absolutely love my little sister. She is such a strong person and someone who I see growing up each and every day. For the last few weeks, I have been talking to everyone who gives me the time of day about the amazing fact that she will be not only moving to Utah in 9 days, but living with me in Utah in 9 days.

We are single digits away from one of the most exciting days of 2014.

Diana Laura Peck

Build Capability

Let me tell you a little bit about the Leadership Pattern.

There is this thing called the golden circle that looks sort of like this:

It basically is a theory saying that in order to inspire change you need to start with WHY rather than WHAT or HOW. Here is an example of a computer company (given by Simon Sinek)...

Many people know WHAT they do: "We make great computers"

Some people know HOW they do it: "We use the best operating systems and we make things easy to use"

But very few people know WHY they do it.

The common computer ad:

"We make great computers that have the best operating systems and are easy to use. Wanna buy one?"

Other companies, such as Apple work from the inside out, so their ad would sound more like this:

"Everything we do, we do to challenge the status quo. We do this by using the best possible operating systems and making our equipment easy to use. We just happen to make great computers... Wanna buy one?"

See the difference?

As I have worked for the Church as a Lead, I have begun to study the Leadership Pattern more and more and it looks like this:

WHY:

To lead like the Savior would, because he is our greatest example and we strive to be more like Him.

HOW:

By acting under the direction of the Spirit and aligning with the brethren, including the Prophet, First Presidency, Quorum of the Twelve Apostles, Presiding Bishopric, etc.

WHAT:

Define direction in all we do.

Counsel together at all times.

Build capability in ourselves and others.

Organize the work in a way that helps us to actually do it.

Accomplish the work that needs to be done.

Render an account to take responsibility for your work.

This pattern has helped to shape my semester and my outlook on a lot of things. I know this is already a long post but let me tell you a story... I have an employee who has extreme social anxiety. He has trouble being around people and hardly ever talks. When I got to the Conference Center, I more or less felt as though I could not approach him because every step you take toward him, he backs up four. So many people saw him and saw only that. They put him in jobs and positions that required the least of his abilities and he was tired of it. He asked me one day why he was never considered for full time employment when he had applied several times and I told him that I didn't know. At that moment though, I knew that I had to do everything in my power to help him get full time. I moved him to a different assignment so that he could learn different processes then I went ahead and put him in the next cart certification class. He was certified so I moved him to the Ride-On Vacuum assignment. When I did that, I spent the following week working side-by-side with him to fully train him on his assignment. He now does it within the required time and perfectly. His last evaluation score was a 96%. He continued to apply for full time and was still not getting anything. Finally, I did the last thing I could think of doing.

I do not put my name on the line very often, but for this employee, I would have given anything to see him succeed. I sent a recommendation to the person in charge of hiring that was about one and a half pages long. The next day, she emailed my supervisor and told her that he started full time the following day. I have never seen him more happy than when we gave him the news.

My supervisor spoke to me later about how I was the reason that he got that full time job, and honestly, I can say that I did have a huge part in it, but more than anything, he put himself in a position to become better. I see so much potential in so many people and they don't realize it because people judge themselves so harshly.

There is this saying about training fleas that talks about how if you put fleas in a jar with a lid and leave them for about five minutes, you can take the lid off and they will only jump as high as the lid was because they were accustomed to jumping only that high. They forgot their potential and capability. If you introduce a new flea into the jar that immediately jumps out, the other fleas will immediately jump out because they are reminded that they can jump higher than the lid. (credit to Josh Noble for telling me that one.)

I have a strong belief that we can do so much more than we think possible. Look at how far you have come already. Look at all the good you have done. Look at what you can possible do and go do it. Build your own capability because sometimes we don't have other fleas to remind us that we can do more. When they aren't there, try jumping out of the jar anyways; you never know what you might achieve.

Diana Laura Peck

Information from:

The Leadership Pattern

Start With Why-Simon Sinek

Alone vs. Lonely...

As I sit in bed at 2:38 AM, I realized that I needed to write something tonight. I'm not sure why, but this day, I've been doing a lot of thinking about life and what I'm doing, and this is my way of sharing today. Time passes slowly. The truth of this statement amazes me when I realize that time passes so quickly. Yet how are both true?

Time passes quickly when you are having a good time.

Yet those moments sometimes make you feel as though the world has stopped just for you.

Time passes quickly when you think about what day it is.

Yet every day feels as though it drags and the year has not moved forward.

Time passes quickly when you are happy.

Yet time is slower than molasses when you are upset.

Recently, I have been kind of in a weird mood and I had no idea why. I was not exactly sad, but not exactly happy. I would go to school, I would go to work, and that was basically life. Little sleep and lots of stuff to do. And I finally figured it out.

Alone is different than Lonely.

Alone. adjective. without anyone or anything else

Lonely. adjective. sad from being apart from other people.

I don't think I am ever alone. I have family, I have friends, and more importantly than anything else, I have my Heavenly Father who watches over me at all times. However, I have felt extremely lonely recently. Here in Salt Lake, I have very few friends and my school and work schedule does not give me much time to see them outside of class. On days that I don't have class, I sleep. When I am not sleeping, I do homework. And when I have a minute to spare, I can think of no one who I want to spend time with.

That last part however is not true. I know exactly who I would text if I could. I know exactly who I would call if they would pick up. I know exactly who I would love to spend a day with if they wanted to be in my company at all. But they don't. And I do not speak of one specific person, but of all of them. My friends. The people who I see in class and nowhere else. The people who I associate with at work and nowhere else.

And here I am at 2:57 AM, lonely.

I wish I knew how to fix it, and I wish I knew what to do, but for the second period of time this year, I feel a bit hopeless.

I am happy. I am doing the things I want to do. I am having great experiences and amazing opportunities.

Yet with no one to share them with, there's not too much of a point now is there?

Diana Laura Peck